Matchmaker, Matchmaker
by Enjy-Glomper
Summary: Enjolras' parents pay him a visit, and decide to play matchmaker. Mary-Sues and drunken Amis members ensue. Majorly renovated. Enjoy Mes Amis.
1. the Visit

**Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match. Find me a find, catch me a catch. **

One day, in the Milky Way, on Earth, in Europe, in France, in Paris, at the Café Musain, and in the back room, Enjolras was standing atop of a table, rallying the A B C friends, when suddenly the door opened and a middle aged man and woman entered the back room.

"Pardon me, but this is a private meeting, you can't just waltz in here!" Feuilly said turning in his chair to address them.

"We have a V.I.P pass, our son is in here, at least the waitress said so . . . "

Everyone in the room was too busy watching the couple that they didn't notice Enjolras pale several shades.

"Well maybe we can help you find him . . .?" Combeferre suggested, wanting them to leave.

"He's blonde, pale, yay high," She indicated about six inches above her head

"And in general handsome"

"Name?", Boussuet asked.

"Enjolras"

All heads turned to the back where Enjolras still stood, eyes wide, white as a sheet, mouth slightly agape.

"There you are!" The women said joyously.

Enjolras made strange choking sounds. (E.G: For a fly had flown down his throat XD)

The man scowled 'Get down from there boy, before you break your neck!"

"Enjolras, who _are _they?" Courfeyrac asked.

"We're his parents!" Madame exclaimed slightly indignant.

"Apollo has parents?" Grantaire asked from his corner.

Enjolras sputtered, "Unfortunately"

Enjolras' father shook his head, "Don't us that tone! We're taking you home for a visit."

The Amis glanced at each other as if to say, _Yep, those are his parents._

Enjolras made more strange choking sounds, "I-I can't leave! I . . . have . . ." Unable to tell his rich aristocratic parents that he was planning a insurgency against rich aristocrats; he drew up a blank, and Combeferre, sensing a disturbance, stepped up to the plate "Exams! We have exams! This week . . . Right now in fact! That's why we're all here we're a . . . a . . . a study group!"

Madame looked at him skeptically, "You all go to the same university as Enjolras?"

Combeferre nodded.

Enjolras' dad stepped forward, "Then, tell us, has he met a nice young girl yet?"

Half the Amis choked on their wine, Enjolras just plain choked. (E.G: On that darned fly again XD)

Grantaire looked up blearily from his bottle, "Enjolras? The same Enjolras I know? The same 'I-couldn't-care-less-if-she-threw-herself-at-my-feet' Apollo? Falling for _A Nice Young Girl?"_ he burst out laughing as Enjolras' parents turned to their son.

"Now, dear, how are you going to find an heir if you don't look for a nice lady?" His mother tsked.

Enjolras seemed to come out of his trauma, "I really don't intend to"

"Pardon?" His father scowled

Enjolras sighed, "I'm not getting married"

His Mother turned her attention to the Amis "How could you let him do this to himself? He can't stay single for his entire life!"

Jehan stood up from his chair "Well, we couldn't very well MAKE him fall in love, it's supposed to come naturally and—"

Enjolras' Father turned towards his wife "But I bet WE could"

Madame giggled evilly "What a perfect idea, Preston!"

Enjolras slowly turned to Jehan "You've doomed me . . . "

Suddenly, Enjolras heard a sharp THWACK and felt an even sharper pain in the back of his head before consciousness left his being.

"Quick! Grab his legs!" Preston commanded.

Madame did so as the Amis stood in astonishment as they dragged him out the door. Madame paused at the doorframe;

"Here" She shoved 200 francs into Courfeyrac's hand "Open a tab in our name, drink and forget about this." She bustled out the door calling to her husband, "Remember, when you put him in the seat that he's face up!"

E.G: Renovated, not-so new and improved, but much more clear!

Disclaimer: Victor Hugo, People! He's the owner! Blame him!

Also (Here's a first) I don't own Fiddler on the Roof.


	2. Let's Review What We Learned

The Amis blinked (almost in unison)

Coufeyrac looked at the money in his hand, "What just happened?"

"I think our fearless leader was just kidnapped . . . by his parents . . .?" Bossuet scratched his ear.

Grantaire grinned foolishly, "And we got 200 francs worth of wine!"

There were murmurs of "It would be rude to turn down their offer" and "Eh, why not"

Combeferre had stood stunned as the Amis members began to drink themselves stupid for quite a while before he came to his senses. "We just let our leader get dragged out the door!"

Bahorel raised his head "Calm down, Joly, Enjolras is over there" He gestured to a broom leaning against a wall.

Combeferre groaned, "I'm not Joly! And that's not Enjolras!"

Joly, upon hearing his name, rose his head and looked around, "Yeah, what? Who said my name?"

Combeferre pinched the bridge of his nose, "I'm surrounded by idiots! Do you realize what Enjolras is going to do to us when he gets back!?"

The Amis, not hearing a single word that Combeferre said past, "I'm surrounded by idiots!" Did not take lightly to being called idiots.

"Get 'im" Bahorel said standing as quickly as he could, the Amis following him. They quickly over powered the young med student and tied him to a support beam

"No wait! You don't under stand! Let go! Let go of me! NOW! Nooo!" Combeferre cried as they attacked and tied him down.

"Shut up, Jolllly", said turning back to his wine glass.

Combeferre saw red, "I'M NOT JOLY!"

The Amis paid no attention to him or his death threats, for they had already turned back to their wine, and slightly later, one by one they all passed out drunk.


	3. Follow that Blonde

**While Combeferre was being PWN'D, Enjolras was steadily on his way to his parent's estate. **

Enjolras opened his eyes slowly. Sitting up, he looked around his surroundings.

"Ah, your awake! Finally!" Madame squealed from her seat across from him.

Enjolras rubbed the back of his head, "What just happened? Where are we?"

Enjolras' Father shook his head, "At the moment we're in a carriage, heading home, you're here for a visit"

At that moment, Enjolras' memory returned "Oh dear Lord. . ."

His parents nodded.

"Now, none of that! We've got some nice young girls we'd like you to meet!"

Enjolras was livid "**None of that?** I've been abducted by **you,** my parents, and am now being forced into some perverse little trick that will only end in marriage!" Enjolras stole a glance out the small window, noting the trees that surrounded them.

Madame frowned, "Well when you put that way . . ."

His Father smiled, which was rather frightening, "Cheer up son, I was only nineteen when I met your mother"

Enjolras was reaching desperation, "I don't care if you were twelve when you met her! I **will not **be subjected into you're little game!"

Madame grinned wickedly, "Are you, or are you _not_ sitting in a carriage, on the way back home? Now how do you can you possibly get out of 'our little game'?"

The point she made stumped Enjolras. So he did the only thing any man would do in his situation.

"Like this" And with that, Enjolras threw the carriage door open and leapt out, tumbling down the road as he made contact with the ground before leaping to his feet and running.

Enjolras' Father quickly leaned forward to yell to the driver, "Quick! Follow that Blonde!"

Enjolras glanced behind him, upon seeing the carriage do a complete circle, he turned sharply into the wooded area that surrounded the road. Of which the Authoress has mentioned. .

Enjolras' parents shot out of the carriage, and watched as their son ran through the woods, jumping over branches and rocks and swing from tree branches over obstacles.

Madame's jaw dropped in shock, "Maybe we _shouldn't_ have put him through boot camp . . . "

Enjolras veered off to the left, out of his parent's sight, pulling himself up onto the limb of a tree, he sat and panted, and plotted _If I can get out of these woods, I can get out of this mess . . . _

"**Enjolras**! Enjolras you come back here **right now**!" His mother called angrily

_Aw, jeez. _Enjolras climbed to the upper most branches, almost at the top of the tree, now all he had to do was wait.

He sat and watched his parents, who were right below him.

"Where'd he go?" His Father demanded.

"I can't believe he did that!"

Enjolras snickered.

For a few more minutes he listened to his parents bicker, until they finally decided to walk away to search elsewhere.

Enjolras gave a sigh of relief and, as he turned to climb down, he heard the tree branch he was standing on groan.

"Oh no," He muttered, walking a softly as he could towards the trunk, only to sense it bending more.

"Oh sh—"

CRACK!

The branch broke, falling to the Earth, taking Enjolras with it.

Luckily (or unluckily, your choice) the fall didn't kill him, but now, he was stuck sitting on the ground, branches piling around and on top of him, prohibiting movement.

Enjolras stood up, and frantically tried to run, failing appallingly.

Of course Madame and Monsieur were close enough to hear the commotion and came hurrying over to see a very struggling Enjolras.

"Now, what did you accomplish?" Madame said, approaching.

Enjolras' rebuttal was struggling more valiantly.

"That's not going to get you anywhere," She continued as Preston walked around the other side of Enjolras, without him noticing.

Enjolras continued to try and jerk free. "That has never once stopped me!"

A loud clunk resonated around them.

Enjolras fell like a rock, as his Father stood behind him brandishing a rather large limb.

"What on Earth possessed you to do that!" Madame cried, "Now he might not even remember us!"

Enjolras' father hauled Enjolras from the offending tree branch and started dragging him towards the carriage, "He's much more agreeable now, don't you think?"

"He's not going to be any more _agreeable_ than he is now, you know right?"

"Of course I know that! I have a second plan"

He told her of his plan as he shoved Enjolras into the carriage.

LES GASP!

Find out in 2 chapter what the plan is! :o

To be continued . . .


	4. Marius to the Rescue

A/N: Wow, I'm so happy, I'm making people happy, and I made a really tasty sandwich

A/N: Wow, I'm so happy, I'm making people happy, and I made a really tasty sandwich! SO NOW I'M HAPPY! (Actually, it's 2:45a.m everything makes me happy)

Oh yeah, and I forgot to thank the ever wonderful Bramblefox for telling me how to add chapters!

Matchmaker chapter 4

The Amis groaned, as far as they were concerned, the lights in the dim backroom where blinding, and Jehan's watch was ticking too loud.

"My head hurts" Joly grumbled as he sat up.

"What happened?", Boussuet covered his eyes and shook his head.

Combeferre raised his head angrily, "I'LL TELL YOU WHAT HAPPENED!"

The drunken Amis members shared a collective wince.

Courfeyrac laid his forehead on the table, squeezed his eyes shut and covered his ears, "Not so loud"

Combeferre was livid, "Oh, am I **talking** to loud? Oh I'm **sorry**! But excuse **me** **if I'm not in the best of moods!**"

Feuilly squinted, "Why's that, Joly?" he asked.

"Well, gee, **I DON'T KNOW**! Maybe, just **maybe** it's because I've been tied to a post for God knows how long!", Combeferre made a concentrated effort to free himself. "And if any of you call me Joly one more time, I'll rip off your arm and beat you to death with it"

Jehan tried to make the room stop spinning, "Who tied you there?"

Combeferre heaved an irritated sigh, "You did! **And now if you know what's good for you, you'll ****un****tie me!**"

No one moved, fearing that the person who did untie him would face his wrath first, but know that if they didn't untie him, Enjolras' wrath was waiting, with was worse than Combeferre's on any day of the week.

Combeferre glared at them, "Well?"

No one moved.

"What are you waiting for?! **A written invitation?!**"

The drunken Amis cringed, before Bahorel stood, swaying, he made his way over to the support beam, but about three feet away from it, he fell to the floor, Dead drunk.

Combeferre swore unhappily.

Coufeyrac stood next, but sadly, he didn't make it as far as Bahorel did.

Just then Marius walked in, "Hi, I'm sorry I'm late, I—" He broke off, noticing the empty wine bottles and unconscious Amis members scattered about the floor. "Boy did I choose the wrong time to miss a meeting, what happened?"

Combeferre turned as best as he could, "The Idiots de les A B C got drunk and tied me here and just let Enjolras' parents take him prisoner" Then turning his attention to the Amis "You do realize he's going to kill us, right?" then turning his attention back to Marius "Could you untie me, the others can't make it ten steps with out passing out."

Marius nodded, knowing that Combeferre was a close friend and associate of Enjolras, and Enjolras was rather scary to Marius.

Marius tugged at the ropes, "What are you guys in the Navy? These knots are impossible!"

Combeferre turned his attention to the Amis, "I'd ask if any of you had a knife, but if you did, you'd be dead already."

"Why's that?" Marius asked tugging at the ropes once more, causing Combeferre to gasp for air.

"You should have seen them! They thought that broom over leaning on the wall was Enjolras!"

Marius made odd faces at the thought, "Let's see if there's anything around here that I can use to cut through them"

He glanced around the room, "A shard of a broken bottle?"

"Won't work, it's dull"

"How about I broke a chair leg? Sharpen it?"

"We're not trying to slay vampires, Marius"

"Sorry. Hmm. . . A candle could _burn_ them off . . ."

Combeferre gave him an odd look "Stick with broken bottles, kid."

Marius shrugged and picked up a bottle and promptly smashed in on a table causing the dozing Amis to wince again.

Marius started sawing through the ropes with it, "So why exactly _did_ Enjolras' parents kidnap Enjolras?"  
"His parents are bourgeois idiots that are hell bent on getting an heir out of him."

"Gross, you could've worded that a bit more gently. So what could they possible do to him? Arranged marriage?"

"Not exactly, they're setting up blind dates."

"Traumatizing. How do you know that?"

"I've had a lot of time to think about it"

"What exactly can we do about it?"

"We are going to recover what is rightfully ours; Our Fearless Leader!"

"He'll never live it down though. . . "

Combeferre gave him a meaningful look.

"Okay I get it"

Marius sawed through the first rope before resuming, "Your dragging me along, aren't you?"

"You bet! I can't very well retrieve him with one of the drunken A B C! And if we don't and he's forced to get married, he is going to rip us apart"

Marius gulped and sawed through the third and fourth rope. "Okay, I think that should do it"

Combeferre tugged the ropes off him, and because he wasn't feeling to forgiving, made his way over to the window, and pulled the curtains open, allowing the sunlight to flood the dinky little room.

The Amis groaned and covered their faces with their sleeves.

"Well, we're off to save Enjolras, and possibly get a whipping from his rich and powerful parents"

"Do I have too?"

"Yes"

"Why me? He doesn't even like me"

"Because you're the only Part-time Amis that isn't blind stinking drunk"

"But I really don't want—"

"Too bad"


	5. They're Here

A/N: Yeah, please ignore the crappy grammar and spelling, I'm not the best writer (Or a very good one : P) now, you learn abou

E.G: Renovations are going swimmingly. :D

Enjolras opened his eyes slowly, scanning the extravagantly decorated room, he then tried to move, but couldn't. "Hey—"

Looking down, he saw that he was tied to a chair. "Oh hell n—"

"Enjolras!"

Enjolras looked up to see his parent's smiling faces. "Welcome to the realm of the living, Boy"

Enjolras' response was to shake the chair violently.

Madame smiled approvingly, "You plan worked perfectly, Preston!"

"What plan? You knocked me out and tied me to a chair!" He cried, looking up from his shaking in astonishment.

"Well, now you can't get away" His father shrugged.

"This seems a _little_ extensive, doesn't it?" Enjolras sighed angrily,

Madame shrugged, "Well, how else are you supposed to catch a girl?"

Enjolras glared, "What if I don't want to _catch a girl_? You make it sound like I'm setting traps!"

Madame pat his cheek in a sardonic way, "That's just too bad, isn't it? You're here now, and you're going to meet some nice young ladies we invited, they were all ecstatic once I said you where here "

Enjolras paled several shades. "How many people did you send for . . ."

Monsieur shrugged, "At the least, dozens"

Enjolras made a strange noise that sounded suspiciously like a strained "Dozens"

Madame sighed, "Oh, calm down, you make it sound like we're about to give you to the wolves"  
Enjolras rocked his chair back and forth aggressively "That's exactly the case!" due to his frantic shaking, he has tipped his chair over. "This is unbelievable!"

His mother scowled, "Now, Enjolras, just calm down, they are very nice young women!"

Enjolras looked up from his thrashing, "How can I get it through your skulls, **I'm never getting married! ****Ever!**"

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK Madame squealed delightedly, "They're here"

"Oh joy of **joys**!" Enjolras called sarcastically from the floor.

"Oh quiet!" His mother scolded, waking over to the door.

Enjolras' Father stood the chair upright and dragged it to join Madame at the door.

"Alright, ladies, come in" His mother said, while she and Preston laid a hand on each of Enjolras' shoulders.

E.G: More to come.


	6. What's our Gameplan?

A/N: GENTLE-READERS

A/N: GENTLE-READERS! REVEIWERS! SEND ME YOUR SUES! I'm completely devoid of Mary-Sues! And I want you guys to have a say in it. :D

Disclaimer: I own nothing, 'cept the story, Characters and all belong to Victor Hugo. : B

Combeferre and Marius left the café and once they were on the street, Marius had questions as they walked down the street.

"Do you know where his parent's live?"

"Yes, Marius"

"Do you have plan on how we're even going to find him?"

"Yes, Marius"

"How are we even going to get there?"

"Carriage, Marius"

"How can we even afford that?"

Combeferre triumphantly held up the two hundred francs.

Marius gaped at the money, "How did you get that?"

"Coufeyrac"

"You stole it from Coufeyrac?!"

"No! Well, kinda, but it wasn't his money"

"Whose is it then?"

"The Enjolras'"

Marius paled considerably.

Combeferre shook his head slowly, "No, Marius, not _our_ Enjolras"

"Oh . . . you stole from his parents?"

"NO! Damnit Pontmercy! I didn't steal anything! They _GAVE_ it to us!"

"Okay, okay, let's just find a cab and get going" He just wanted to get it over with and stay in one piece.

Marius hailed a cab, and as it stopped in front of them, they hearded someone calling.

"Hey! Hey, Combeferre, Marius!" A little boy called, racing towards them.

Combeferre smiled and waved, "Hello, Gavroche, what have you been up to?"

Gavroche shrugged, "Eh, the usual, how 'bout you two?"

"Not much, just Enjolras was taken hostage by his parents and we're off to save him before he's forced into marriage," Marius said simply, and was immediately whacked upside the head by Combeferre.

Gavroche tilted his head to the side, "His parents abducted . . . him?" He fell to the ground in hysterics as Marius blushed and Combeferre sighed.

"That I've got to see!"

"No!" Marius and Combeferre cried in unison.

"C'mon! I can be useful! I have a couple of firecrackers; we could throw those 'stead of rice at the weddin'" Gavroche snickered.

"No Gavroche—" Combeferre started but was cut of by Marius

"Maybe we should take him"

"What?!"

"Hey, he has firecrackers, that's more then we've got!"

Gavroche smirked, "Told ya"

"And he could be useful in some cases, what do we have to lose, besides, Enjolras won't kill us with him around, and if he does, Gavroche can bear witness"

Combeferre rolled his eyes, sighed and turned to Gavroche, "I guess that even if we didn't take you, you'd stow away on the carriage,"

Gavroche nodded vigorously, "You bet"

Combeferre shrugged, "Fine, you can come, but only—"

He was cut off by Gavroche's short cheer, "But only if you stay quiet"

"'scuse me, Messieurs, but are you coming or not?" the driver asked impatiently.

"Yes, we're coming" Combeferre said as he climbed into the carriage, followed by Marius and Gavroche.

"hold on, Messieurs, the kid will cost extra, I don't want his fleas all over my nice, clean carriage,"

"Hey! I don't have fleas you prickly, old—" Gavroche let lose a string of profanities I dare not repeat.

When he was finished The Driver, Combeferre and Marius we bright red and their mouths agape, and ten seconds later, they found themselves standing on the street as the carriage sped down the street.

"Well, Marius, it looks like we _will_ be walking there . . . "


	7. Introductions

A/N: Yikes, I haven't updated in a long time

A/N: Jeez, I'm really sorry for the long wait, I just had a severe case of writers blck and I've been busy with the Collab me and Ignored Genius have been working on (And the sequel is comin' soon :D)

Dear readers, because no one but dear ol' Bramblefox, (Who is getting a fanfic tribute soon, staring Javert. Betcha wish ya sent me Sues, huh? -laughs-) sent me an idea for the Mary-Sues, this chapter will consist of God-Awful Sues in stories I've read, Grantaire's sister for example. Meant to offend? That's for you to decide.

Disclaimer: Plot's mine, but nothing else, characters, names, all those belong to Victor Hugo. Kay?

And it may seem like I'm exaggerating, but Mr. Hugo said Enjy was pretty, so there. : B

Disclaimer: Victor Hugo owns them all.

ONE MORE NOTE, Credit to Ignored Genius for help in writing and hooray for our collaboration! Read misadventures of the musicals . . . or we'll find you.

"No! Don't come in!" Enjolras called, struggling in vain to free himself.

"Yes, come in" Enjolras father said.

"No!"  
"Yes!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"N-!" Enjolras' mother clapped a hand over his mouth.

"Yes, do come in, dear ladies," She said calmly.

"'Oo!" Enjolras cried, muffled by her hand.

Enjolras father, who had enough of this foolishness, stepped forward and opened the door, revealing dozens of young women.

"Ladies! Please, come in and meet our son; Enjolras!" Madame said warmly, gesturing to Enjolras, who had lost every bit of color in his face. She and Monsieur took a step back, allowing the girls to surge at Enjolras, fawning over him and, once again, knocking his chair over backwards.

"Look how pretty he is!" one young lady cried, pinching his cheek and standing his chair up again.

"Isn't he?" Another cried, mussing his hair.

"No I'm not! Get off of me!" Enjolras ordered, jerking his head away from the sues who were patting it..

There was a moment of silence.

"He's so authoritative!" A third Sue swooned

Enjolras groaned unhappily as his parents high-fived in the background.

"Oooh! He groans so sexily!" Another cried. Enjolras opened his mouth to order them, yet again, to get off him and stand his chair upright, but was interrupted. "-Gasp- look at his perfect white teeth!" Enjolras was then over come by the girls swarming to his chair, sitting on him and said chair.

"Look at his hair!"

"His lips are red like a girl's!" rang out around him.

"Get off of me! Get off! _**Now**_!" he cried trying (E.G: Failing) to free himself. Another girl gasped, "Omigawd, he has the sexiest cry."

"I know rite?"

"Ladies, remember you're supposed to go on a _date_?" Monsieur said, gesturing towards the door.

Enjolras rocking violently in his seat " No! NOOOOO!" He bellowed as the girls dragged him and his chair away.

Just them a teenager with long brown hair rode in on a horse, "Um, 'scuse me, but is there an Inspector Javert here?"

"Uh, no, Mademoiselle" Preston said, exchanging a confused glance from his wife.

"Oh, thanks then" She said, turning her horse. "C'mon Colletta, we're gonna find us an Inspector"


	8. Gavroche Solves All

A/N: Well now, let's how the Amis Combeferre, half-hearted Barricade Boy Marius and Junior Amis member Gavroche are doing

A/N: Well now, let's how the Amis Combeferre, half-hearted Barricade Boy Marius and Junior Amis member Gavroche are doing.

Disclaimer: I own no-sing! ('Cept the plot, mind you!)

"Gavroche, what possessed you to do that!" Marius cried as the trio headed down the boulevard.

Gavroche stuck out his lower lip (E.G: All those who weren't afraid of being spit in the eye would've call it "**A pout**") "I don't have fleas!"

"It doesn't matter! You still cost us a trip on carriage!"

"Walking is good exercise, now quiet!" Combeferre ordered absent-mindedly.

"Wus up wit' you?" Gavroche asked.

Combeferre rolled his eyes, after all that happened to him, his usual gentle patience was running a little thin.

"Besides the fact that I just spent the past twelve hours or so tied to a post?"

"Yeah, 'sides that" Gavroche chirped, a lopsided grin planting itself on his face.

Combeferre shook his head, not wanting to fight with a kid. "Let's just keep walking in _silence_"

Gavroche stuck his tongue out at him, "Why can't we just hail another cab?"

"Because, dear gamin, word around carriage drivers spread like wild fire" Marius said, kicking a pebble down the road a ways

Gavroche giggled slightly, "Why don't we steal a horse?"

"Yes, Gavroche that's exactly what we'll do! Steal a horse!" Combeferre stated sarcastically, also kicking a pebble.

"Gavroche," Marius started, "where'd you get such a foolish—Hey, where'd he go?" he asked Combeferre, looking around for him.

"Oh jeez, that kid just disappeared?" Marius asked rhetorically, "First that foolish 'stealing horses' and now he vanishes!" Combeferre gave him a look that said 'You're overreacting'.

"Oh, so we're _not _stealing horses?" Gavroche asked, appearing, with the reins of two horses in his little hand.

"Gavroche what are you doing! Where did you get those?" Combeferre asked astounded.

"Stable," The gamin said, pointing to a nearby stable.  
"But how—" Marius started, before a big burly man ran out of the stable that Gavroche pointed too, waving a machete, once he spotted the trio, he began to run towards them.

"Time to go, Marius!" Combeferre cried, grabbing Marius by the back of the collar and tugging him backwards before hopping up onto one of the horses, tugging Gavroche up with him before pushing the horse to a gallop.

Marius quickly scrambled up onto the other horse's back and quickly followed Combeferre's example and galloped after them, leaving the Machete Man in their dust.

E.G: Whoo! I had serious writers block on this chapter!


	9. Unlikely Story

A

243

A.N: I . . .. Have nothing to say . . . which is kinda a new experience . . .

Disclaimer: Victor Hugo owns Enjolras, Sues are mine und various other people.

Enjolras was hollering and struggling as the girls dragged him across his parent's lawn to a nice gazebo that was placed next to peaceful looking stream and bridge. Once they were at their destination, they placed Enjolras on the bridge and immediately started firing introductions at him.

"HI! My name if Adeline-Bethany-Celeste! My initials spell out A B C! HA!" One enthusiastic sue cried, shaking him slightly.

"Alright, that's enough, you don't want to hurt him" Another Sue said softly, gently pushing Adeline-Bethany-Celeste away, "Hello, Enjolras, My name is Estelle Sarah Prouvaire, very nice to meet you," She curtsied and turned away blushing for no real reason.

"Prouvaire? As in Jehan Prouvaire?!" Enjolras cried. To the best of his knowledge, Prouvaire didn't have any siblings.

She nodded shyly, "Yes, but I may or may not have died at birth,"

Enjolras blinked in confusion and was about to ask how that was possible when another Sue rudely pushed passed her and slinked seductively to Enjolras.

"Hey, my name's Naomi-Alicia, and I was just a normal prostitute before you found me and took me to you're place and nursed me back to health," She tugged at his hair lightly before winking and turning away. Enjolras grit his teeth to keep himself from yelling at her that he did **not** know her and had **never**picked up a whore in his life and **never EVER** would.

"OMG Enjaloruse!" A different sue shrieked in excitement, hopping up and down like a bunny, "My name si Lila De Fontoir!1!!!1!! I'm leik your big3st fan!!!!one!! I luv u!!!! hundred eleven!!!!eleven!!one!!! "

Enjolras stared at her in bewilderment, "What does that even mean?!"

Lila let out a shriek that could curl your hair before collapsing into a dead faint.

One of the sues shook her head, "What a positively mindless girl," she commented, adjusting her glasses, "Enjolras, I beg you to forgive her, she's wild about you," She gestured to Lila De Fontoirwho lay in a heap on he ground, "And I don't know if you remember me, but you and I were neighbors around fifteen years ago. You pledged you're eternal love to me. Do you remember? My name's Alexandria Combeferre," She adjusted her glasses once more.

"Alexandria **what**!?" Enjolras shouted.

"Combeferre, you know my brother," She said, adjusting her glasses.

"No! I have never heard of you!"

Alexandria pouted slightly, "You'll remember me soon, don't worry," She pat his head and headed back into the crowd as a young blonde girl, who looked suspiciously like a little female version of Enjolras, stepped out of the crowd, "Um, 'scuse me, monsieur, I'm not here for a lover, but I need a decent role model, my older brother has a pretty bad drinking problem," She did a little curtsy, "My name's Angela-Louise-"

"Drinking proble-? Oh, God don't tell me—" Enjolras cried, knowing what was to come.

"Grantaire,"

"Who didn't see that coming?" Enjolras muttered.

Angela-Louise Grantaire looked at him with her big blue-green eyes, "What do you say?"

"Little girl, is your 'older brother' the same obnoxious, hard-drinking, bar-song-singing, Greek mythology obsessed Grantaire I know?"

"Oh, yes I heard him talking to me about you when he was visiting my grave, he says you look like me," She retreated back into the crown as a confidant young woman with a French flag tied around her itty-bitty waist stepped forward, "All these stupid girls!"

Alexandria Combeferre turned to face her, "I beg to differ," she then, adjusted her glasses once more for emphasis.

"Shut up! I'd rather be building a barricade or saving people! And as for you, you rich bastard, I couldn't care less, my main concern is for the people of France and their well being!"

"Patria, you're too angry for your own good, you know," Adeline-Bethany-Celeste said laughing like a maniac.

"Patria? Oh now this has gone way to far!" Enjolras yelled, glaring venomously at her.

"That's a very striking glower you have . . . I think I'm falling in love with you," Patria said, gaping at him.

Enjolras rolled his eyes.

Another Sue skipped merrily up to Enjolras as Patria continued her gaping, "Salut! My name is Elise Salandra Debonair! I'm from a rich bourgeois family but, get this, I'm not a total snob!"

"You're only ninety-nine percent snob?" Enjolras asked sarcastically.

"No! Really," She continued not noting his sarcasm, "I'm very sweet, generous, stunningly attractive, extremely modest, and I have great taste in dresses," She then cast an inspecting look at him, "And men,"

Enjolras couldn't repress a look of contempt.

Another Sue swiftly pushed Elise Salandra Debonair and Patria out of the way, clambered onto Enjolras' lap and put both of her hands on his shoulders, "Bonjour!! My name's Eponine Thénardier! I somehow change from a flea-bitten, toothless, emaciated, nutty gamine into a gorgeous young lady!" She released his shoulders and griped his collar tightly, "But just 'cause I'm drop-dead, stop-and-stare, stunningly, Cosette-ishly beautiful doesn't mean I'm not tough!" She slapped him hard across the face before stomping away over the horizon, she was apparently furious at him for something.

Enjolras blinked, which was his first mistake, for in the time it took him to blink, she was back from her horizon stomp and sobbing pathetically into his pant leg, "I'm so sorry, Enjolras! Please forgive me! We're perfect for each other! I need you!" Eponine-Sue screamed between her sobs.

The Sues, being the softhearted young women they were, instantly began to cry, collapsing onto his knees, sobbing like infants.

Enjolras sighed dejectedly and looked over the edge of the bridge to the water, "I wonder if a fall from here would kill me . . ."

E.G: The whole 'Bridge Thing' just reminded me so much of Javert, I couldn't help it. XD

Stay tuned for a check in with Marius, Combeferre & Gavroche!

NOTE: If I ever find out how to work the new I'll post this. :D


	10. Is There Anything You Can't Do?

Okey-Dokey, for the sake of the plot, let's say Marius, Combeferre and Gavroche have been riding along for a few hours.

Disclaimer: Uhh (I'm really running low on creative disclaimers) I'm not a dead French author named Victor Hugo, and if I am, COOL! I made a masterpiece! 8D

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Are we there yet?" Gavroche asked impatiently as the horses plodded along a forest road.

"No," Combeferre said tiredly.

"Are we there yet?"

"No,"

"Are we there yet?"

"Yes,"

"Really?"

"No,"

"When are we going to get there?"

"I don't know," Combeferre answered

Marius shifted uncomfortably in the saddle, "Honestly, do you know how long we'll be riding?"

"Not a clue," Combeferre replied mildly.

"That's great to know, doc! Way to inspire confidence!" Gavroche said, annoyed.

"Don't blame me! You didn't have to come," Combeferre retorted.

"Let's call it a night," Marius said shyly, "The horses are probably tired and we can find an inn somewhere around here,"

Gavroche shook his head vigorously, "Trust me, you do **not **want to stay at a tavern in the middle of nowhere,"

"Why?" Marius asked.

"Innkeepers are slime. The rooms are dirty and pricey. The people there are drunk and noisy. We'll probably be robbed blind before dawn," Gavroche said, counting off each on his fingers, "Oh, have I mentioned that Innkeepers are slime?"

"Yes, but Gavroche we're--"

"Hold that thought, Combeferre," Marius interrupted, "Look at that," he pointed to a clearing on the side of the path where there sat a large pile of tree limbs.

"That's strange," Combeferre said, distracted from his debate with a nine-year old.

Gavroche hopped off the horse and headed over to the clearing, "Ya know, I'd bet good money that Blond-o was here,"

"What makes you say that?" Marius asked, also dismounting and following the child to the pile.

"The shoe prints," Gavroche said simply, "And I haven't seen a carriage since we left Paris," The child pointed down the road a ways to four deep circular rifts in the dirt made by the desperate and reckless driver of the Enjolras' carraige.

"He's right, Combeferre," Marius said, "Take a look,"

Combeferre climbed off his horse and walked over to the two.

"What do you make of it?" Marius asked, picking up a piece of splintered wood.

"Well there are signs of a struggle," Combeferre picked up a segment of a large branch, "If the branches fell naturally, it would be rotted at least," he tossed the branch away and stooped down, "Considering the isolation of this road, I'd say that-," Combeferre walked back to the road, reenacting what he thought happened, "Enjolras made a run for it," He jogged towards the damaged tree, "Climbed this," Combeferre grabbed what was left of a limb, "Fell," Combeferre then plopped down on the ground, laying on his back, "He was most likely knocked unconscious from the fall or something along those lines and then," Combeferre sat up and looked at the ground that he had just laid on, seeing two long, straight skid marks leading back to the path, "Was dragged away?"

"So in other words they were here?" Marius asked, confused at the long explanation.

"Yeah, that's the basic gist of it," Combeferre said, brushing a leaf from his sleeve.

"Have you ever considered being a detective?" Marius asked, helping Combeferre to his feet.

"A police officer? Of course not, I'd rather cure illnesses than drop kick criminals,"

Gavroche smirked, "Well done, Sherlock, but we just wasted quite a bit of time,"

Combeferre dusted his pants off, "I thought you wanted a break from riding,"

"I didn't want to watch you do a one-man-show," Gavroche said suppressing a laugh.

"I—" Suddenly the sound of pounding horse hooves filled the air.

"What is that?" Marius asked, concerned as the three ran to the road and were immediately greeted with the sight of machete man on an enormous black charger.

"Yer gonna give me back my horses even if I haveta rip off yer arms form 'em!" He screamed madly as he charged towards them.

"How did he find us?" Combeferre demanded, quickly pulling himself onto the saddle of one of the horses and nudging it into a gallop.

Marius yelled in an incoherent, slightly spazzy tone as he scrambled up onto the other pony.

"Shut up and F&!#IN' RUN!" Gavroche cried, doing a flying leap onto Marius' trusty steed and giving the animal a swift kick, sending it flying down the path.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Personally, I'm not too happy with this chapter, I've gots a painful cough and a sore throat and I leaped through hoops to get this written, but I promised a check-in with the fellas, and I'm happy because people seem to like this fic. 8D

But anypuddles, now I'm going to do something that all good authors do before they die; Beg for feedback. REVIEW!! I get really happy when I get reviews, so cheer up a poor High School kid and drop a word of wisdom in the review bucket. Thank ya kindly!


	11. A New Face

Okay-poodles, My hoop jumping is over with, I figured out how to work the new ! –Dances- Yeah boi!

Disclaimer: Okay, do I really need a disclaimer for every chapter? I'll check with the administration. Anyhooddles, Victor Hugo made Les Misérables, and since I'm not him, I don't make any money, so I'm broke, but writing none-the-less.

NOW let's see how well Enjolras is fairing.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Are you all done, now?" Enjolras asked irritated.

The Sues sniffled pathetically and stood one-by-one and delicately blew their noses. (The noises sounded like a flock of geese flying overhead)

Sarah Estelle Prouvaire nodded and blushed bright red.

"Good," Enjolras said, looking dismally at his soaking pant legs.

Naomi-Alicia stood last, wiping her eyes with her sleeve, "Well now," She sniffled, "Now, who has a traumatic childhood story they'd like to tell?"

"What--!" Enjolras shook his head vigorously, he would have tried to tip the chair, but he was too tired and bruised to do that anymore, " Oh no! Absolutely not! I'm sitting through that!"

Eponine Thénardier's large, mocha-chocolate-latte colored eyes narrowed, "Oh, so now I'm not good enough for you!?"

"Would an 'I'm not interested in you in any way, shape or form' suffice as your answer?" He asked.

Eponine pouted and decided to use direct quotes, "You don't seem glad to see me?"

"I've been dreading this! And do you honestly think that'd I'd be tied down if I wanted to see you?"

Eponine sighed, "I thought we made a real break through,"

"Yeah, Enjolras, I thought you had a tender, kind hearted young man, like a young President Lincoln!" Adeline-Bethany-Celeste commented, for the first time not laughing.

Enjolras gave her a blank look that said both, 'Huh?' and 'Who?'.

"Oh, that's right! I'm from the future!" Adeline-Bethany-Celeste said, bursting into laughter, "Lincoln is the pride of America!" She paused, "Oh. Yes! I'm American too; did I forget to say so? But I don't hate Lincoln, even though I'm from Virginia and my uncle is General Robert E. Lee, and I have to over come that and re-earn his love again!"

He shrugged, "Alright then,"

"Ha!" Eponine Thénardier scoffed, "I have criminal parents and a boyfriend who may or may not beat me as I writhe pathetically in a corner as he does so and kills any man who comes close to me! But I still love him even though I love Enjolras!"

Enjolras paled slightly at the 'Kills any man,' part. He wasn't about to die before a big break through in the revolution!

"Pfft, that's bad?" Alicia-Naomi asked, crossing her arms, "I'm a prostitute, I have T.B and I'm pretty much a poorly written Fantine! Except instead of Jean Valjean, Enjolras takes care of me and we fall in love!"

Enjolras stared at her, starting to get a little uneasy, "Who . . . ?"

"Yea, yea, buncha babys," Lila De Fontoir snorted, even though she had fainted in the previous chapter.

"Shut up!" Patria yelled at her, "France is in such crappy conditions, and whomdo you think gets blamed for that? Enjolras is the only one who believes in me!" She stamped her foot childishly.

"Sure. . ." He said, uncertainly.

"I have nothing to complain about," Elise Salandra Debonair said, examining her nails.

Alexandria Combeferre took off her glasses and cleaned them in a scholarly manner, "When my big brother left home, our mother went out of her mind, our Father conveniently died and I became the family servant, much like young Cosette, but I managed to be great, beautiful, and have no suppressed memories!" She replaced her glasses and promptly adjusted them.

Enjolras nodded dumbly, not sure of what he should make of the exchanges going on.

Angela-Louise Grantaire's eyes began to water, "I died of some foreign illness that has yet to be explained, big brother went into such a depression over it, he began drinking and--stuff,"

"Uh—how . . . tragic?" Enjolras said, hesitantly.

Sarah Estelle Prouvaire sniffled tearfully, "Very tragic," Then she blushed. Bright. Freaking. Red.

"Enjolras! And Mademoiselles! " His father called as he came walking towards them, "How are the dates going, son?"

"Torturous. Can I go now?" Enjolras prompted.

"Do you want to marry any of these fine young ladies?" His Father asked.

"Do I want to marry any of these dead-behind-the-eyes women? No. Not any more then I did before," Enjolras said bitterly, before adding in a brightly sarcastic way, "But thank you so much for asking! I _really_ appreciate it!"

"Don't be a smart alek! And no you can't go," His father snapped.

"I'm going to be a smart alek because I'm stuck here! And don't be stupid!" Enjolras snapped back mockingly.

"I just came here to let you know that there is a young man up at the house. He's a little, uh," He looked horribly uncomfortable.

"Hel-lo! Enjolrash!" A male voice called from across the yard.

Enjolras' eyes widened, "Oh dear God, no . . ."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Well, I avoided typing like the plague, I'm uninspired and all my updates on Javert's Retirement kinda covers the tardiness on everything else . . . I hope.

And a cookie for anyone who can guess who this estranged visitor is, here's a hint; Gary Sue. –laughs wickedly at the thought-

Technically, I wrote an EnjyXOC . . . But it's exactly the way I thought it would be, filled with cruel mockery and disdain. –nods approvingly-

THE PEOPLE HAVE SPOKEN! In my poll, half of the people voted serious and the other half voted funny, I need a tiebreaker. Please vote.

Anyhoodles, Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. 8D


	12. Hot Pursuit

Disclaimer: Enjy-Glomper no own Les Miz. So buzz off all ye lawyers who wish to sue me!

Am I a FAIL cat or what?

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Gavroche snuck a glance behind him at the gaining Machete Man, "Faster, Marius!"

Marius nudged his heels into the horse's side even more, "He won't go any faster!"

"Try harder!" Combeferre shouted over the thundering hoof-beats also sneaking a peep behind him and pushing the horse to speed up.

"You can't run forever!" Machete Man laughed manically.

Marius let out a strangled scream as he stood in the saddle and snapped the reins.

Gavroche turned and looked at their pursuer before he reached into his pocket and drew out a firecracker, "I was saving this for the prefecture building, but now would be better . . ." he said to himself, pulling a match out, too. Facing forward again, he struck the match on the rough edge of the saddle with a sharp hissing sound.

Marius started slightly, "Gavroche, what was that sou—"

Gavroche threw the explosive at the black steed's feet; it exploded on impact.

The beast reared back and whinnied in terror as the foreign 'thing' crackled and spouted sparks before bucking Machete Man clear off his back and running in the opposite direction.. Marius and Combeferre's horses raised their speed ten fold in their panic to also get away from the 'thing'.

"You little bastards!" Machete Man screamed at them

Gavroche showed him his middle finger.

"Put that down Gavroche!" Combeferre scolded as he clutched the reins tightly, "What was that?"

"That was to be a token of appreciation to my dear friends at the police joint but now that man's spoiled the surprise!"

. –~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

E.G: Jesus, I've had a riveting—what has it been? 10 months? –ducks knives thrown by once cherished readers- I'm sorry, though! I had writer's block! But this chapter is more or less filler until we can get back to Enjolras and find out who his new visitor is! –face palm- Again, feel free to yell at me about the lack of chapters. 8(


	13. Worse Comes to Worst

E.G: God al-freaking-mightly. I haven't updated this since October! Oh my God! And you know, I actually forgot the Sues' names so I had my handy-dandy Internet Explorer open on the introduction chapter.

Les Mis ain't mine.

Enjolras stared in horror at the figure as it came towards him, "Oh no! No! No! No! No! No! No! No!" He yanks his arms and legs side to side in a failure of an attempt to avoid the next disaster of an OOC.

"Big brother!" Angela-Louise Grantaire screamed and rushed at him

Yes, it was indeed Grantaire, yet, not Grantaire. For the real thing was still in the café, this young man in bright purple spandex pants was but a cheap copy.

"Oh, my dear, sweet little sister!" Grantaire wailed, his voice had a higher pitch and he had a slight lisp, he got on one knee and collapsed into a hug with his 'sister'.

Enjolras let loose a frustrated roar and accidentally toppled over to the left, knocking Eponine Thénardier and Patria to the ground.

Estelle Sarah Prouvaire stooped to their level, "Are you all right?"

Eponine Thénardier sat up, "A little fall of rain can hardly hurt me now."

Enjolras tried to worm his way to the creek bed to drown himself or float all the way to Germany, Poland, the Atlantic, anything to get away from the worst of the worst of Gary Stus. Grantaire let go of Angela-Louise and stood up, "Silly, what are you doing down there?"

"Having a tea party with the Queen of England! What do you think I'm doing?" Enjolras snapped at him.

His father snickered.

"Well it seems to me that you're trying to escape responsibility." Grantaire said, crouching down.

Enjolras spit out a mouth full of grass and glared a glare that fumed with disapproval. "Is that right?"

"Umm-hmm, here let me get you up." He reached for the chair back.

"Oh, no, no!" Enjolras jerked away, "I'm fine down here thanks."

"Suit yourself." Grantaire shrugged and gave him a brief pat on the head.

"Well, I'll leave you kids alone." Preston said as he began to slowly back up

"Don't do that. . ." Enjolras said hopelessly.

"Hey, I needed an heir and now you need an heir, thus you need a wife."

Enjolras sent a sidelong glance at 'Grantaire', who was busy complimenting Estelle Srah Prouvaire on her satiny lavender dress, "But, then why-"

"Because it's very funny to me." Preston said snidely, reminding us all that he was a horrible, _horrible_ person and taking his leave.

"Such a Enjolras let the side of his head fall back to the moist earth.

"Cheer up, chico," Adeline-Bethany-Celeste said, completely serious for once, "It isn't so bad, we're all very nice, beautiful young ladies." Though she couldn't hold the serious moment for too long and fell to the ground, clutching her stomach and laughing so hard that she was crying, her simple comment caused Enjolras to be struck with brilliance, "Alright, fine, I agree. But which one of you is the nicest and most beautiful?"

The sues fell silent.

"Well, I think that Naomi-Alicia is much more beautiful than me." Estelle Sarah Prouvaire said sweetly.

"I think not, honey, look at you, you've got everything I don't." Naomi-Alicia said, giving the younger sue a hug.

"Don't sell yourself short, you're gorgeous, Naomi-Alicia." Grantaire complimented with tears welling in his eyes.

"Aww, I love you guys!" Elise Salandra Debonair choked out tearfully as all the sues (and stu) cooed and pulled in for a group hug.

Enjolras sighed, knowing that his plan had completely failed.

Suddenly Eponine Thénardier's ultra-sensitive eyes widened and she pulled away from the group hug. "We are not alone." She commented ominously.

"Whaa?" Lila De Fontior asked intelligently.

E.G: -pacing back and forth* How could this happen? I've become what I can't stand, someone who promises updates and then waits forever to actually fulfill their promise.

-puts a hand to her forehead- Drop a review on your way to the line to kick me in the head for not fulfilling my promises.


	14. Born in Vice, Say it Twice

Been a while huh? Yeahhh. . . kindly don't kill me. . . .

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX

Marius, Combeferre and Gavroche ditched the exhausted horses at the Enjolras Estate gate and quickly and quietly scaled the fences. Ducking behind a bush, they carefully examined the area. "This is boring." Gavroche whispered earnestly to Marius.

"Did you expect it to be fun?" Marius replied.

Gavroche thought of stealing horses, getting involved in a high speed chase with aforementioned horses and blowing up Machete Man. "Well, it has been so far."

"Shh! Listen!" Combeferre shushed putting a hand behind his ear.

Off in the distance they heard a faint, "Oh no! No! No! No! No!No!No!No!"

Marius cringed, "What's going on?"

Combeferre shrugged, "Gavroche, do you see-!" He looked around urgently and was stunned when he saw the young boy marching onward towards the yelled protests, glancing back at them to offer a parting shot, "If you ladies wanna hide from a bunch of girls be my guest."

Marius quickly scrambled after him followed shortly by Combeferre, "We weren't hiding, we were surveying." Marius corrected.

"Whatever you say, Marion." Gavroche replied with a shrug.

"Hold it." Combeferre pointed down the way to where Preston was strolling back towards the house, laughing. "Odd."

"Not really, I'm starting to think that this entire family is insane." Marius said thoughtfully.

"Hey over here!" Gavroche called quietly from his place on the crest of a nearby hill, "Look, down there. "

"What is it?" Combeferre asked, coming up next to him followed by Marius.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX

Enjolras sat hoping that they might forget he was there if he was quiet enough.

Eponine Thénardier closed her eyes and brought her hands together all the while mumbling in a dead language.

"Um. Like, what are you doing?" Lila De Fontoir asked, poking her in the tummy.

"Channeling more of our kind for assistance in apprehending this interloper."

"I see." Alexandria Combeferre nodded, polishing her already spotless spectacles.

Eponine Thénardier opened her eyes, which had turned completely black, "**Born in sin, come on in**."*

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX

Marius suddenly stood up straight as a board.

"What are you doing?" Combeferre hissed, grabbing at his arm.

At his touch, Marius gurgled and began to shake violently, his eyes wide and colorless.

"Oh my God!" Combeferre exclaimed, pulling him down to his level.

Marius then spoke in a voice that wasn't quite his own, "Born in lust, turn to dust!"

"Gavroche!" Combeferre called quietly, "I think there is something very evil here!"

Gavroche rolled his eyes, "Yeah, there probably is, but this is an old innkeeper trick." He went up to his possessed comrade, leaned back and socked him in the face.

"Ow!" Marius clutched at his now blackened eye, "What just happened?"

"Someone's using an ancient innkeeper trick to mess with us."

"And how did punching him help?" Combeferre asked.

Gavroche shrugged, "Go visit my father and ask him, I only know that punching has solved most of my problems." Gavroche had lied, anyone who was in the chop house business knew of the dark power that could be used.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX

Eponine Thénardier jolted back, crying out and grasping one side of her face.

"Oh my good golly goodness! Are you alright?" Estelle Sarah Prouvaire fussed.

"Peachy, for I know where they are." She pointed one elegantly overly detailed manicured finger up the gentle slope to where the trio was stationed.

"Run for your lives!" Enjolras warned them, though he couldn't see who they were, he wouldn't wish his ordeal upon his worst enemy.

Patria started towards them, suddenly crazier than a rat in a coffee can, brandishing a dagger from midair, "Prepare to die for the republic!" she shrieked with laughter, until she tripped on the edge of her gown and tumbled down the slope.

Her howls and Enjolras' warning had caught the attention of the three who instantly knew they were discovered.

"Gavroche, get out of here! It's too late for—"Marius started.

"Don't waste your breath, he's already gone." Combeferre pointed out. Gavroche had, in fact, already made it to the top of the iron fence and was hopping down when the sues reached the newly established duo.

Lila De Fontoir and Naomi-Alicia used their super Valjean-esque strength to drag Marius and Combeferre to where Angela-Louise Grantaire had used her magic powers (and random innocence) to produce two new chairs adjacent to a stunned Enjolras.

"Big brother!" Alexandria Combeferre fly tackled/hugged Combeferre. "It's been so long!"

"Do I know you?" Combeferre asked as he was shoved into a chair.

Her lower lip pooched out, "It's been so long you don't even remember me!"

"Trust me lady, I'd remember you."

"Shut up, you!" Patria slapped him harshly across the face, "Just shut your imperialist mouth!"

Alexandria shoved her away, "Puh-lease, do you even know what an imperialist is?"

Patria sulked a moment before stomping off.

Combeferre shook his head

"We're here to save you, Enjolras. . ." Marius said slowly

"_Much_ appreciated." Enjolras thanked as Combeferre and Marius were tied down.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX

-headdesk-headdesk-headdesk- I know its late, just review please, I need nourishment! -wanders away to get food-

By the way, none of my transition things were showing up, anyone having trouble with that or is it just me?

*That born in sin, thing is a Stephen King quote. And many cookies for those who guess which one!


End file.
